Today is 1000 days since I stopped drinking and smoking
I had smoked, with a few short breaks, since I was 17, and been a ‘problem drinker’ wiht pregnancy breaks since I was 20.
1000 days ago, I had no idea if 7 days would be possible. The idea of 1000 would have terrified me and sent me running to the shop for wine and cigarettes. I didn’t allow myself to look beyond the next weekend. As long as I could get to the end of the next weekend, I had done well.
I know it is still less than 3 years, but 1000 days feels huge.
There have been so many gifts in these 1000 days.
I treasure every single one of them.
Even the shitty ones (there have been plenty of those!)
1000 days I can remember going to bed
1000 days I don’t have a hangover
1000 days I can look in the mirror and not be filled with loathing at who I see
1000 days of growing to like, and even love, that person I see
1000 days of getting to know me as I really am
1000 days of accepting my flaws instead of drowning them out
1000 days of realising it is ok to feel sad, stressed, unhappy. It is ok to FEEL
1000 days of becoming me
1000 days of deep breaths
1000 days of finding my purpose in life
1000 days of loving life rather than fearing it
1000 days of becoming bold
1000 days of taking better care of this body I live in
1000 days of experiencing the world, not hiding from it
1000 days of self respect
1000 days of realising I was always worthy of love
1000 days of coming to understand why I didn’t think so
1000 days of Marcus being safe in my care
1000 days of being a better role model for my boys
1000 days of being more proud of myself than any of the other days before, even on the days when I feel less than proud of myself
1000 days of owning my mistakes instead of blaming others or retreating in shame
1000 days of realising that sometimes life will suck big time, but it won’t always
1000 days of not having to worry if one of my kids would have to wake up and find me dead next to a bottle.
1000 days of not drunkenly googling alcoholism, and the possible outcomes of my addiction, then getting so anxious about what I read, I would light up a cigarette and drain my glass.
The next 1000 days are going to be all these and more
The next 1000 days will bring more love, joy, passion and adventure into my life
The next 1000 days will see me becoming more me
The next 1000 days are going to see me shine brightly
The next 1000 days are going to be all about my purpose and mission, now I have figured it out
The next 1000 days are going to be EPIC!
I am so grateful for everything I have learned in the last 1000 days, and the many days that came before, and I am so excited about the next 1000 days and beyond!
One minute, one hour, one day, one week at a time, those 1000 days soon add up.
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